Monday, April 17, 2006

Hey Ho Nuts, Meet Dunkin' Donuts

Copyright infringement. ??
No sir.

Coach Duncan Fletcher tries his skills at basketball!

Right. So this is English cricket coach Duncan Fletcher. We've brought you many fake tales about him, and here's another one to add to your collection...

After the English cricket team's dismal performance in India, the coach not only received death threats from some Anglo Indian septuagenarians, but was also unceremoniously dismissed by the ECB. Left with no alternative, or job, his mortgage spiraling out of control, little Duncan was left with no choice but to take to the streets - playing street-ball. I mean, it was almost like destiny had come full circle - Dunkin Fetcher was finally who he was named to be - a top notch hoopster.

Duncan's A Special Chai-ld

Duncan's Special Chai? English cricket coach Duncan Fletcher pours some magic potion on the pitch as Liam Plunkett glares in astonishment :-O
Seen here are English bowler I Am FlunkItt and coach Jhankaar Stretcher, trying out a new magic potion - CHAI TEA - to revive the sagging spirits of England's One Day cricket team.

Now, I have more than one complaint here.
- First off, CHAI=TEA=CHAI (chai=tea in HINDI), so WHAT IN THE HOLY FUCK IS CHAI TEA? Its like saying, ummm "Hi, Hello", or, "Water Pani".
- Cricinfo has a new "caption this picture" contest. What fucking copycats. Okay, I get some really neat pics off these guys, but I don't steal their ideas. On another note, it might not be that bad - on a site like that, they can't afford to be as rude and outrageous as we can.
I forgot what the last one was, but I do have the Duncan's Special Chai story...
A long time ago, when I was a young warthog, I used to watch BoreDarshan, India's state-owned, state-sponsored, propaganda machine, and television channel, where this one really annoying ad jingle was that guessed it...Duncan's Special Chai. I think they wanted to say "Duncan's A Special Chai-ld"...

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Who Wants To Be An Austrillionaire?

Hey kids, when I first moved to Australia from India, I hated it. Over time, I've begun hating India, so much that when Australia plays India, I don the green and yellow paint, and boo the Indian cricketers till I'm kicked out of the ground for misbehaviour.

I wanna be a cricketaroo too!

Anyway, my hard work has borne its fruit. India not only has an Aussie cricket coach in Greg Chappell, but Indian players are becoming more and more like us Aussies! The only problem is, they think jumping like a kangaroo will make them a true cricketaroo. Won't it?